- I have a friend who works as an investigative journalist, reporting on organized crime.
- For very different reasons, the two of you are members of the same relatively small group: people who have probably had cause to formulate proof of life questions at some point.
- She has had to do this because her work often takes her to objectively dangerous parts of the world, places where being a journalist makes you an obvious kidnapping target.
- You have probably had to do this because you are Jeb Bush, a somewhat powerful man of thoroughly unwarranted influence and wealth aka the kind of man who might present an attractive option for kidnappers.
- I am not a member of this group. I don’t have any money or power, I have never lifted the lid off any international crime rings, I don’t do anything dangerous, and I cannot think of a single reason why anyone would want to kidnap me. I would offer very low returns, ransom-wise.
- In spite of or indeed because of the fact that I have no money or power or influence or insight into the underworld, I have spent quite a lot of time thinking about what my proof of life questions would be.
- In the incredibly unlikely event that I was taken hostage and the negotiators were on the phone, how would my family know that it was me answering the questions, and not an impostor?
- What are questions that only I would be able to answer? What are signals that I could give that would indicate to my family that I was indeed alive and basically sound of mind?
- Here’s a few: “Does she burst into helpless wails of laughter at the mention of the phrase ‘Low Energy Jeb?’”
- “Does the phrase ‘Low Energy Jeb’ have her crying with mirth in her cell, despite being in a physically uncomfortable and psychologically taxing position?”
- “Despite being hungry and tired and afraid, does the idea of Donald Trump saying the words ‘Low Energy Jeb’ make her punch her little fists in the air with delight?”
- If the answer is yes, then it’s me.
- If the answer is no, then that’s an impostor, because I have been laughing at the thought of Donald Trump calling you Low Energy Jeb for like three and a bit years now, and I do not foresee a future in which I will be able to stop.
- Why is it so transcendently funny? I don’t mean funny compared to Donald Trump’s other names he has for people, all of which are so fucking stupid and strange.
- I mean funny compared to genuine masterpieces of comedy.
- Low Energy Jeb.
- Do you think your family has ever laughed at it quietly when you weren’t around?
- I would.
- Have you ever acknowledged its genius, even to yourself?
- I bet you have.
- Happy birthday.
Hmm, looks like you don’t have MetaMask activated!
If you know what MetaMask is and have it installed, activate MetaMask and refresh:
If that doesn't make sense to you, click here:
The MetaMask window should have popped up and asked if you want Popula to have access to your MetaMask. Click the blue CONFIRM button.
Don’t see the MetaMask window? Click here to request it again:
Your MetaMask extension is running, but for privacy purposes you have to allow us to connect to your MetaMask wallet.
You need to connect to the Main Net before you can actually tip. Click on your MetaMask icon so the window pops up, then select ‘Main Ethereum Network’ from the dropdown.
How much do you want to tip?
You can adjust either amount to see how much ETH or USD you’ll be sending.
You can adjust the tip amount in the MetaMask popup window before confirming the transaction.
Popula’s authors contribute 5% of their tips to Popula to help with the overhead of running the tipping system.
Author participation in the Popula tipping system is optional; if an author declines to participate in the tipping system, your tip will be refunded to you in full within 60 days.
Your MetaMask window has popped up now, and you need to confirm the transaction.
Hit that blue 'Confirm' button to make it happen!
Did you reject the transaction by accident? Want to adjust your tip amount? Click here:
Maybe you’re not quite comfortable with this yet?
That transaction didn’t go through for some reason.
Try clicking on the MetaMask button in your browser bar (looks like this: ) and see if you have any transactions listed at the bottom of the popup. If you don’t see the tip you just tried to leave, then try again:
Or just want to ask us about it? We’ look into it personally for you.
Thank you so much for your tip, and for your direct support of journalism. The author will appreciate it a lot, and so do all of us at Popula.
Want a receipt? Enter your email address and click ‘Send Receipt’ and we’ll send you a transaction receipt.
You can see your transaction logged in MetaMask. Just click the MetaMask button in your browser bar—this one: —and your transaction will be listed at the bottom of the popup.
You can also track the transaction on the Etherscan website. It usually takes under a minute for the transaction to process, and you’ll get a notification from MetaMask when it’s done.Track on Etherscan
If you have any questions at all, please let us know!
All set?Home to Popula, please!
We know this cryptocurrency stuff is new and weird. We’re here to help you understand. Ask us email@example.com
ETH is Ether, a popular cryptocurrency generated on the Ethereum blockchain.
You’ll need some Ethereum cryptocurrency (ETH) in a MetaMask wallet in order to tip an author. Currently it’s not possible to tip in other cryptocurrencies, or in dollars or other fiat currencies.
For a comprehensive FAQ to help get you started, please visit our help page, “How to Tip Your Favorite Authors with Cryptocurrency on Popula!”
If you have any questions at all, please let us know!